“You don’t deserve to eat that because you were bad yesterday.”
“You can’t be trusted with XYZ food so you’d better not have it in the house.”
“You blew it again so you may as well eat everything and start over tomorrow!”
“You must be stupid to be this age and still have so little control.”
These are just a few of the real thoughts my clients and workshop participants share with me when we talk about the Food Police – that inner voice that monitors our food choices and consumption on a daily basis… the things we say to supposedly motivate ourselves to stick with whatever eating plan we have adopted.
And it’s no surprise given that the $70 billion dollar weight loss industry bombards us with messages that suggest we can’t trust our appetites and that we have to be in tight control around food lest we subject ourselves to insidious toxins, moral violations, or even worse – body fat.
But I have to ask you – what’s the impact of this on your SOUL? Does that kind of shame-based motivation make you feel uplifted and nourished, or depleted and hungry inside? (I think we can agree on the answer!)
One of the secrets to creating a healthy relationship with food is that you’ve got to choose a new kind of eating plan… in fact it’s not a plan so much but a whole new perspective on eating. You have to build up an immunity to the cultural conditioning that creates fear and anxiety around what or how you eat, and chips away at how you feel about yourself if you don’t follow the rules.
In fact, I’ve been noodling around with a new plan myself. Actually, it’s more of an anti-plan! I call it Soulful Eating, and I’ve been teaching it in my workshops to rave reviews.
So if your soul is hungry for a little something more than food fear and judgement, I’d like to invite you to try it on for size… It’s a way of looking at your relationship with food that takes into consideration not just your physical health, but also the vitality of your soul.
Soulful Eating rests on 4 Core Beliefs:
1. Eating is Sacred:I believe we have lost touch with the sacredness of eating. We instinctively know that eating is required for life. Every time you choose to eat, a little voice inside of you is saying “I choose to live!” Food should be felt as beautiful, creative, intimate… life affirming. What if you were to open up to the soul desire to live every time you come to the table, instead of judging or shaming yourself over any particular food choice?
2. Pleasure is a Nutritional Necessity: Many people don’t realize that pleasure is an physiologic requirement in order for our bodies to effectively digest and assimilate the food we eat, AND a key factor in natural appetite regulation. No pleasure = no satisfaction = more food. Willpower has nothing to do with it. And I’m not just talking about pleasure with food. If you’re not getting enough pleasure in life, it’s predictable that you might turn to food to get your fix. Increase your pleasure across the board and watch your relationship with food transform.
3. Nourishment Knows Best: Most of the information that floats around in the nutritional world is focused on science of the food. It’s all about various beliefs on what’s “nutritious” or not nutritious according to the bazillions of (conflicting) studies that exist. We drive ourselves nuts trying to figure out the “healthy” or “nutritious” thing to eat based on what we’ve been told. But when was the last time you stopped to ask,“What would truly nourish me right now, and how do I know?”
Your body knows what you really need if you are willing to listen. Tune out the noise and ask the inner questions that will guide you to the right choices.
4. The Soul Speaks Through Symptom: If you have an unwanted food challenge or habit (binge eating, overeating, obsession with calories, extra weight, etc.), or any compulsion for that matter, it’s usually pointing you to something else. When you focus on trying to fix or force the symptom away, you miss the real message. What might your soul be asking of you by creating this symptom to get your attention?
Perhaps it’s calling you to slow down and nourish yourself, to honor some emotions, to leave a toxic relationship or job, or perhaps it’s signaling a hunger to live more fully on purpose (like many of my clients!) The good news – no matter what your food challenge is, there is nothing wrong with you. You’ve just got a vocal soul!
Try being a Soulful Eater this week and see what you notice. I’d love to hear how it goes!
